They Don’t Always See It, But We Do

One hard part of foster care is loving these kids so closely while having almost no say in the things that shape their everyday lives.

We are the ones who see their fears, their habits, their triggers — the little signs no one else notices. We are the ones holding them through the storms that no report, no monthly visit, no therapy note truly captures. And yet, decisions are made by people who only see a small piece of their world.

It’s exhausting. It’s heartbreaking. And sometimes it feels like we’re standing in a fire we can’t step out of.

The only lifeline we have some days is our RCs.
The ones who fight for us.
The ones who refuse to give up on these kids, even when everyone else steps back.

People don’t see what RCs carry.
They don’t see the sleepless nights spent in ER waiting rooms.
They don’t see the phone calls, the school visits, the holidays interrupted.
They don’t see the way RCs show up — even when they’re tired, even when they’re hurting too.

They give pieces of themselves.
Time. Sleep. Family moments. Emotional energy they didn’t even have to begin with.
And rarely are they recognized for any of it.

Sometimes the kids push them away. Sometimes they talk about them like they’re the bad guy.
But it’s not because they don’t care.
It’s because caring is scary.
It’s because love has hurt them before.
It’s because trusting someone to stay feels like the biggest risk of all.

What I hope — someday — is that these kids look back and see the truth:

RCs were the ones who stayed.
Not just on the easy days.
But on the hardest ones.

They were there in the breakdowns.
They were there when hope was thin.
They were there when the world felt unsafe and unfair and too heavy to carry.

They were there.
No matter what had to be sacrificed.
No matter how much it cost them.

I hope one day these kids realize that love was there — quietly, steadily, fiercely — long before they were ready to receive it.

And it never left. We love you guys and can't thank you enough. 

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